Saturday, January 5, 2013


A senior citizen drove his brand new Corvette convertible out of the dealership.  Taking off down the road he pushed it to 80 mph, enjoying the wind blowing through what little hair he had left.  "Amazing" he thought as he flew down I-95 pushing the pedal even more.

Looking in his rear view mirror he saw a State Trooper, blue lights flashing and siren blaring.  He floored it to 100 mph, then 110, then 120.  Suddenly he thought, "What am I doing?.  I'm too old for this!." and pulled over to await the trooper's arrival.

Pulling in behind him, the trooper got out of his vehicle and walked up to the Corvette.  He looked at his watch, then said, "Sir, my shift is over in 30 minutes. Today is Friday. If you can give me a new reason for speeding - a reason I've never heard before - I'll let you go".

The old gentleman paused then said  "Three years ago my wife ran off with a State Trooper.  I thought you were bringing her back".

"Have a good day, Sir", replied the trooper
The owner of a golf course was confused about paying an invoice, so he decided to ask for some mathemetical help. He said to a member of his staff, "Y'all graduated from the University and I need some help.  If I was to give you $20,000, minus 14%, how much would you take off?"  Someone in back piped up with "Everything but my earrings". 

A man had a flat tire, pulled off on the side of the road, and proceeded to put a bouquet of flowers in front of and behind the car.  Then he got back in the car to wait.  A passerby studied the scene as he drove by, and was so curious he turned around and went back.  He asked the fellow what the problem was.  The man replied:  "I got a flat tahr".  The passerby asked, "But what's with the flowers?"
The man responded.  "When you break down they tell you to put flares in the front and flares in the back.  I never did understand it neither."


A state trooper pulled over a pickup on I-65.  The troooper asked "Got any ID?"
The driver replied, "Bout whut?"

The Sheriff pulled up next to the guy unloading garbage out of his pick up into the ditch.  The Sheriff asked, "Why are you dumping garbage in the ditch?  Don't you see
that sign over your head."
"Yep", he replied. "That's why I'm dumpin it here, 'cause it says 'Fine For Dumping Garbage'".

These made me laugh - you know at one time or another we've all come across situations where  people have left you scratching your head in disbelief.  I am sorry to say I probably have been one of them at one time or another. 

Another football weekend coming up - will have to find something to do - my team is in a "by", but hubby will be watching regardless.  

Don't forget to stop by on Monday for story day.  This week's story will be in two parts and it is a sequel to one that was previously posted.

Have a great weekend and see you later for more Aimless Ramblings.


  1. Loved them all, but the first one is the best! have a good weekend...I am hoping for a quiet one!
    hugs abby

  2. LOL Sunny - Loved them all but agree with Abby - the first one is the best!

    Have a wonderful weekend.


    1. I like the first one best two. The others are okay if you can add the southern accent to them.

  3. LOL, these are great :D I'll be having a Sons of Anarchy marathon while Musicman watches football all weekend. His team plays tomorrow night, that one I'll watch with him, but all of them is a bit too much for me.

    1. Yeah, I'll watch my team, but a whole weekend after the last couple of weeks and I am footballed out.

  4. These were great, I shared them with Mollie. Enjoy your weekend - we're getting ready for Christmas 2.0!


  5. These were great! It's been a long week ... and I'm still logged into work. I needed the laugh. I look forward to Monday's story.

  6. OMG We were laughing out loud reading these together!!
    Cannot wait to start my Monday off, with a perfect story!

  7. Loved them all Sunny, thanks for sharing. The first was my favorite too.

    Have a great weekend.


  8. Lol, Sunny! Kudos to the guy in the first one. That's the kind of thing I think of later, and wish I'd thought of at the time! ;-)

    Breezed through your posts catching up. Loved your last story and looking forward to Monday's new one! Thanks for sharing your wonderful writing with us.


  9. I read the first one to my hubby and he laughed and laughed.

  10. These were great. I almost wished we had State Troopers here.
    No chance that I'll forget Monday.

    1. They're good guys until they stop you for a ticket. LOL

  11. Oh my, very funny. Thanks for sharing and making me laugh.

    Enjoy your weekend.


  12. Hahahahahaaa. Loved these. I've missed your humour :)

    Dee x

  13. Sunny,
    We laughed at all of them, Ian and I - but he laughed an uncomfortably long time at the first one..... :)
    hugs to you and your man,
    ian and lillie

    1. I think they're are days that my hubby would like to give me to a State Trooper or anyone for that matter. lol

  14. These are wonderful, especially the first one which I read to Starman. I'm presuming a state trooper is like a traffic cop? It's one of those jokes you need to remember to tell your friends.

    Hugs, Ami

  15. Oooooh, I'm a groaner huh. Look in the mirror girl.

  16. Yes Ami, a state trooper is a law enforcement officer that works for the state as opposed to a county or city. I think the first one was the funniest.

    Hope you remember, I always seem to "blow" the punchline.

  17. I am still laughing. My team has a bye this week too. And yet football is still playing on the TV's throughout the house. Have a great weekend

    1. Glad you enjoyed. Realized I just left the football comment on your post.


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