This is a hoot.

I don't think I want to know what my grandsons think - they are older now so it might not be as bad, or it could be worse.

How grandchildren perceive their grandparents

1. I was in the bathroom, putting on my makeup, under the watchful eyes of my young granddaughter, as I'd done many times before. After I applied my lipstick and started to leave, the little one said, "But Grandma, you forgot to kiss the toilet paper good-bye!" I will probably never put lipstick on again without thinking about kissing the toilet paper good-bye.

2. My young grandson called the other day to wish me Happy Birthday. He asked me how old I was, and I told him, 72. My grandson was quiet for a moment, and then he asked, "Did you start at 1?"

3. After putting her grandchildren to bed, a grandmother changed into old slacks and a droopy blouse and proceeded to wash her hair. As she heard the children getting more and more rambunctious, her patience grew thin. Finally, she threw a towel around her head and stormed into their room, putting them back to bed with stern warnings. As she left the room, she heard the three-year-old say with a trembling voice, "Who was THAT?"

4. A grandmother was telling her little granddaughter what her own childhood was like. "We used to skate outside on a pond. I had a swing made from a tire; it hung from a tree in our front yard. We rode our pony. We picked wild raspberries in the woods." The little girl was wide-eyed, taking this all in. At last, she said, "I sure wish I'd gotten to know you sooner!"

5. My grandson was visiting one day when he asked, "Grandma, do you know how you and God are alike?" I mentally polished my halo and I said, "No, how are we alike?'' "You're both old," he replied.

6. A little girl was diligently pounding away on her grandfather's word processor. She told him she was writing a story.
"What's it about?" he asked.
"I don't know," she replied. "I can't read."

7. I didn't know if my granddaughter had learned her colors yet, so I decided to test her. I would point out something and ask what color it was. She would tell me and was always correct. It was fun for me, so I continued. At last, she headed for the door, saying, "Grandma, I really think you should try to figure out some of these colors yourself!"

8. When my grandson Billy and I entered our vacation cabin, we kept the lights off until we were inside to keep from attracting pesky insects. Still, a few fireflies followed us in. Noticing them before I did, Billy whispered, "It's no use, Grandpa,  now the mosquitoes are coming after us with flashlights."

9. When my grandson asked me how old I was, I teasingly replied, "I'm not sure." "Look in your underwear, Grandpa," he advised, "Mine says I'm 4 to 6." (WOW! I really like this one -- it says I'm only '38'!)

10. A second grader came home from school and said to her grandmother, "Grandma, guess what? We learned how to make babies today." The grandmother, more than a little surprised, tried to keep her cool. "That's interesting, she said. "How do you make babies?" "It's simple," replied the girl. "You just change 'y' to 'i' and add 'es'."

11. Children's Logic: "Give me a sentence about a public servant," said a teacher. The small boy wrote: "The fireman came down the ladder pregnant." The teacher took the lad aside to correct him. "Don't you know what pregnant means?" she asked. "Sure," said the young boy confidently. 'It means carrying a child."

12. A grandfather was delivering his grandchildren to their home one day when a fire truck zoomed past. Sitting in the front seat of the fire truck was a Dalmatian dog. The children started discussing the dog's duties.
"They use him to keep crowds back," said one child.
"No," said another. "He's just for good luck."
A third child brought the argument to a close. “They use the dogs," she said firmly, "to find the fire hydrants."

13. A 6-year-old was asked where his grandma lived. "Oh," he said, "she lives at the airport, and whenever we want her, we just go get her. Then, when we're done having her visit, we take her back to the airport."

14. Grandpa is the smartest man on earth! He teaches me good things, but I don't get to see him enough to get as smart as him!

15. My Grandparents are funny when they bend over, you hear gas leaks and they blame their dog.



I guess I need a dog, do you.  See you later for more Aimless Ramblings.

Facing the Past - Part two

Good Morning all.  I'm posting this ahead of time and hope it comes up as planned.  This is the second part of the story from last week - some new - some old.  Hope you enjoy.

The beginning

She was still his Callie – she may be taller and some of her angles had turned into womanly curves, but she still had that long strawberry blond hair.  It was pulled back in a pony tail and swung from side to side with the gentle sway of her hips as she walked away. 

“I’ll get you a menu.”

When she returned with the menu he could see she still had that smattering of freckles across her nose and those cornflower blue eyes that were always able to see right through him. He knew from the investigator she had never married and that Lila had bought the diner in which he now sat a couple of years after he left town. 

Once things quieted in the dinner, she came over and sat down in the booth.  He could tell she was nervous – hell, so was he. 

“Why?’ was all he said.

“Why what?” she responded.

“Why did you send back all my letters? You know I didn’t have any control over my leaving. You knew my father.”

 “I never received any letters.” He could tell by her stunned expression, she was telling the truth. 

“Well, someone returned them to me unopened.”  Her face flushed as she realized it must have been her mother’s doing. “I’ve kept them if you want proof.”

l

“Daniel, that’s all water under the bridge and I see no reason to dig up old dirt.”

“I have good reason to believe there is.”  Her face flushed again.  The bell over the door jingled and a nine-year old boy walked in.  Daniel lost his breath, it was the image of him at that age. So, the investigator was right.  He yelled, “Hi Mom” as he walked through the swinging doors to the kitchen.  Callie spun on her heels and ran to the kitchen as if there were demons on her tail.

While he sat in the booth awaiting her return he thought about all the time lost with his son and how difficult her life must have been.  Dealing with pregnancy at sixteen in a small town could not have been easy.  Even with today’s relaxed standards, there were always small minded righteous people in a town the size of Newton that could make life difficult for her and his son.

Why hadn’t she contacted him?  Surely, once he became famous, she could have found him.  Then he thought back to those returned letters.  She didn’t realize he cared and his father’s actions didn’t stop his feelings for her. Damn him, he knew she was pregnant and that’s why he sent me away and left Newton for good? That bastard.  Damn him and his righteousness and thinking he could make everything and everyone bend to his will.

The next thing he knew, Lila Morgan was standing next to him.  “Did you come here to cause trouble?”

“Hello, Mrs. Morgan.  No, I came because I learned I probably had a son.  After seeing that boy walk in here a while ago, I don’t think you could possibly deny that he is my flesh and blood.”

“And if he is, do you plan on upsetting him by announcing you’re his father and then taking off the way you and your father did when he found out Callie was pregnant.”

“I knew it, that sonofabitch.  I never knew Callie was pregnant.  I wrote to her for a year after I left and every letter was returned to me unopened.”

“I know, I was the one that returned them. There was no need for her to have any hopes of getting together with you. Your father arranged for Callie to have an abortion.  He paid for the abortion and for my silence about the whole thing. Callie refused to have an abortion so I used that money to buy this place so we had a place of our own. I saw no reason to let anyone know and I was just doing what I thought was best for everybody.”

“You mean what was best for you and my father.”  He was getting angry and it wasn’t all Lila’s fault, but she was the one standing in front of him at the moment.

He calmed himself down as faces started to turn their way.  This wasn’t how he planned this meeting to go.

“Lila, I’m not going to let this go. I’ll give you time to adjust, but I intend to be a father to my son and I will take the steps necessary to make that happen.”  He handed Lila a card and told him to have Callie call him. 

                                                ********************

Callie did call him and arranged to meet him that evening.  They agreed to meet in his hotel room where they were assured a degree of privacy.  In a small town, there was always someone around to eavesdrop and Daniel was trying to keep his identity under wraps, at least for the short term.

She was nervous, not sure how she felt about Daniel; it had been too many years of hoping to hear from him and being disappointed. Once he became famous, she was afraid he would fight her on having custody of their son; he had the wherewithal to take her to court. He could provide a much better life for him. The Daniel she used to know would not have done that, but was he the same Daniel?  All those thoughts went through her mind as she knocked at the door. He beckoned her in, placing his index finger to his lips and rolled his eyes upward, silently telling her to listen. It became very apparent some intense lovemaking was happening in the room above.  They could hear what sounded like a headboard banging against the wall and the cries of a woman in the throes of orgasm. Callie smiled at Daniel and the ice was broken, their connection was back.

They talked for hours, sharing what their lives were like in the intervening years between then and now.  It was well past midnight.  She yawned and said she had to get up early the next morning and was going to call it a night.

“How do you see this going forward?” He asked her.

“That is a topic for another time, right now I’m going home and going to bed.”  He reached over to kiss her goodnight.  His lips lingered with her sweetness and he was wont to pull away, but he did. They agreed to meet again the following day and the conversation took up where they left off.

“I think that depends on you.  Do you plan to continue your musical career?  Is that even a possibility?” Callie wanted to know.

“I’ve talked with my fellow bandmates, Jeff and Brett, and they’re not sure they want to restart?  Hell, I’m not sure if I want to restart again, pursue a solo career, or just live an entirely different life.  Right about now, a whole different life is very appealing to me, especially if it includes you and my son.  Is there a chance for us?  I know what we had when we were younger and I would like to build on that.  I haven’t had anything even close to that since, notwithstanding what you may have read.”

“If you plan to be a father in more than name only, then you can definitely count on being in Danny’s life, I won’t stop you.  If you just want to be a cardboard cutout of a father, I will fight you tooth and nail.  He’s better off just the way it is now than be continually disappointed because you’re never around.  As for us, I guess it depends on how you answer the first question.”

“Let me ask you this, does life with you and Danny have to be here in Newton?”

“Until I know we’re permanent, the answer is yes.  I’m not about to uproot Danny until then.”

“I understand that, and I want to be present when he learns about me.  I want to try and explain why I haven’t been around until now.”

“I’ll have to think about that.”

                                                

                                            ****************************

In the end, Callie granted Daniel’s request.  Their first meeting took place in a nearby park.  He spied Danny and Callie walking toward him.  They were holding hands and when Danny saw him, he looked at Callie and Daniel realized he knew, he didn’t need to be told.  It was a sweet moment, Daniel allowed Danny to make the first move.  Daniel stood as Danny came forward and extended his hand.  Daniel shook his hand and then enveloped him in a hug.  “Sorry, young man, I need more than a handshake.” Daniel was trembling, he didn’t think he’d ever been so nervous in his entire life.

“You’re my dad, aren’t you?”

“Yes, I am and I’m so sorry this is the first time I’m meeting you. I assure you, from this day forward I will be available to you every single day, in one way or another.” Tears rolled down his face and Callie realized she too had tears in her eyes.

See you later for more Aimless Ramblings.

Facing the Past.

More than midway through this very short month, time flies.   It has been an emotional week here in the US. The senselessness of children being slaughtered because the NRA has such a hold on our Congress makes me want to scream.  I think of my grandkids,  our daughter and son in law who are in education, and all the other children and educators and pray for them and their well-being.  No where is safe anymore.  Children must be taught to be self-aware and look for places to hide in schools, malls, movies, churches, restaurants.  What happened to a world where those places were once safe? 

Sorry, I didn't mean to bring that here but the tv is on and well... I did take heart though in listening this morning.  The young people are standing tall, taller than the adults who should have been and making their message heard.  Maybe, just maybe, this is finally the time.

Anyway, on to the story.  Some of you may recall part of this story.  I've reworked it and added to and it will be featured over the next couple of weeks.  Hope you enjoy.

Daniel Lodestone walked into the establishment, his eyes searching for a familiar face. He had been gone a long time and wasn’t sure if there was anyone left who knew him back before all the hoopla.  He didn’t want to be recognized so he purposely downplayed his appearance. He hoped that sporting a three-day growth of beard, clipped hair with all highlights removed, glasses instead of contacts, without his usual garb and minus his entourage, would go a long way toward making him unrecognizable except to those who knew him well. His eyes locked on his target – his search was over.  His past and his future were about to collide.

She felt eyes boring into her.  She was used to people staring, so at first, it didn’t phase her.  It wasn’t until she had that creepy feeling on the back of her neck that she paid attention. It can’t possibly be him, not after all this time was her first thought.  His eyes never wavered as she went about her business.  When she couldn’t ignore him any longer, she felt her shoulders slouch and her reserve disappear – it was him, and she wasn’t sure what to do.  Time was up; he was coming toward her.

“Hello, Callie,” he said unsure of himself.

“What are you doing here?”  Her manner was defensive.

“I think we have some things to discuss, don’t you?”

“I can’t imagine what they would be.”

.

“I think you can.” From behind her, he heard someone yell to her that customers were waiting, and their food was getting cold.

“I have to get back to work.”

He took a seat at an empty booth.  “Fine, I’ll just sit here and wait.”

Callie Morgan grew up with Daniel Lodestone. He was her first childhood friend and in the beginning, they were like brother and sister. Jacob Lodestone, Daniel’s father, came from a long line of wealthy businessmen and when Daniel’s mother was killed in an automobile accident,  a long list of people helped him raise Daniel.  Callie’s mother was one of them.  She was employed as a housekeeper but became more like a surrogate mother, especially once Callie began accompanying her mother to work. It was easy to think of Lila that way. It was fine until Jacob Lodestone found them with each other in Daniel’s bedroom. They weren’t doing anything more than talk but Jacob read much more into the innocent situation.  He told Lila Morgan not to bring Callie around anymore, and he forbid Daniel to spend any more time with Callie. 

Jacob Lodestone never gave it a second thought. He naturally assumed his edict was obeyed.  After all, his directives were always adhered to the letter.  But to Daniel, the forbidden fruit was all the sweeter.  Daniel and Callie continued to meet clandestinely – it wasn’t that difficult, Jacob was not an attentive father and Lila worked all day.  It wasn’t until Lila Morgan informed Jacob Lodestone that Callie was pregnant and Daniel was the father that he realized drastic measures needed to be taken. He had bigger plans for his son than to end up with the housekeeper’s daughter. 

Furious, he immediately shipped Daniel off to military school and arranged an abortion for Callie. He paid Lila for the cost of the abortion and her future silence on that matter. He cut all ties with Newton and relocated to Los Angeles, California.

Daniel’s efforts to stay in touch with Callie failed.  His letters returned unopened and after a while; he quit trying. He and his father became more and more estranged through the ensuing years. While in college, Daniel and a couple of his friends started a small band. They began to get quite a following and soon, much to his father’s displeasure, Daniel dropped out of college to pursue a full-time music career. The band, Full Speed Ahead, was ‘discovered’ playing in a small club near the LA airport.  They were an instant hit and soon every cliché you ever heard became their life. Daniel, the spokesman, and lead singer became the fodder for every ‘rag’ in the supermarket shelves.  Every sordid detail was chronicled in magazines and tabloids in and out of this country.  Some of it was true, but most were stories made up by the band’s publicist.

 His life continued in this fashion until that fateful day when the band’s tour bus was involved in a fatal accident that took the lives of two of his bandmates, and the drivers of both vehicles.  Daniel survived, but barely.  His injuries included two broken legs, damage to his pancreas and liver, as well as head trauma and numerous deep facial cuts. He was hospitalized for months, and in rehab for months after that.

While recuperating the one thing that kept up his spirits were the good wishes of all of the band’s fans.  He tried responding to each and everyone personally and one of the notes was from his original hometown.  He opened the note a couple of pictures fell out.  The first picture was old, taken when he was probably about ten – he was standing next to Callie.  He remembered exactly what they had been doing that day – it was at a carnival and he and Callie had just finished eating cotton candy when someone snapped the picture.  He was trying to wipe the sugary concoction away and it looked as if they were kissing.  He smiled at the memory.  When he looked at the next picture, his body went numb.  “What the hell?” he said to himself.  He turned the picture over, looking for a clue or explanation and then turned to the envelope for an address. There was no return address.

After that note, Daniel had a new resolve and made some life-altering decisions. He knew he had to pursue finding Callie.  He contacted his father but as usual, it was like confronting a stone wall.  His father either didn’t have or didn’t share any information. His public persona made pursuing this kind of thing difficult so he hired an investigator to find Callie Morgan.

It didn’t take long. Callie Morgan had never left Newton.  The rest of the information rocked his world and he knew the first step of the rest of his life would begin in Newton. As soon as he was able, he took that first step. 

See you later for more Aimless Ramblings.

An Update andThanks

Thank you everyone for stopping by and sending those Valentine wishes.  It was sweet.  I hope you all had a lovely day as well. Did you do anything special?  I think I mentioned that Ray and I decided to do sushi.  Usually, going out on Valentine's Day is a no go for us - it's always crowded, more expensive, and less meal choices, so we stay home.  That's why sushi was perfect - there aren't many people who chose it as a romantic choice.  We ate our fill and at the end were presented with some Dove chocolate hearts on our tip tray and upon leaving giving a bag of sweet treats.  So charming.

It was a perfect day too in that it rained all day long - not the pouring down rain that many of you experience, but the slow steady rain that patters on the roof, cleans the gutters, grows the greenery and makes us in rain-starved AZ absolutely giddy.

Still overcast today, but sunny days ahead.

Now for the tragic news that occurred on the day reserved for love.  Parkland Florida, my heart bleeds for you.  How do you get past this without thinking of those parents who sent their children to school in the morning never guessing they wouldn't see them come home safely.  Life is so fragile and even more so in this time of easy accessibility of guns - assault rifles, no less, in the hands of teenagers.  I live in an open carry state and I am still in awe when I see the man, or woman, for that matter, in front of me in the grocery line, with a gun attached to their hip.  It frightens me even more when,I see them holding onto children and all that child has to do is grab that gun for bedlam to ensue.  I liked my childhood world - not this adult one.

See you later for more Aimless Ramblings

Happy Valentine's Day

Hope Everyone gets all the chocolate, flowers, love and spanks you can stand.

Monday - story time.

Happy Valentine's Week.  You know last week I mentioned that Ray was sick, well he finally shared and I spent most of the week under the weather.  Have no idea how this story came about - drugs  - but it's a story.

I met Martine when we were both freshmen in college.  We both came from small towns and college was our first taste of life in the big city.  Not that Madison was such a big city, but it was definitely bigger than either of us had ever experienced.  I suppose that’s what brought us together.  That we are still friends is amazing to all who know Martine.  She comes off as a snooty bitch most of the time.  It’s her shield of protection against the world.  Once you break through that shield though, she is the warmest human being you could ever hope to find.  We roomed together all through college and when it came time to go off on our own, we were pleasantly surprised that we had both found jobs in the Dallas Metro area.  Deciding to minimize our living expenses by continuing to live together was a boon for both.  Neither of us wanted to live in one of those high rise monstrosities that seemed to be so popular, so after much searching we managed to find a small house midway between both our places of employment.

Although old and badly in need of some TLC the house was perfect for us.  It was small enough to be cozy but large enough to keep us out of each other’s hair and when we wanted privacy we could vacate to our own space.  We lived and thrived in this manner for almost two years before a  seam began to fray. 

I’d been dating a man, Jed Turner, for about six months before I even brought him around to introduce to Martine.  Much to my surprise she was charming and Jed couldn’t understand why I hadn’t introduced them sooner. He suggested that he bring a friend for Martine and we could double date.  I didn’t want to be responsible for  a rift in the friendship between Jed and whoever he was willing to subject to the whims of Martine so I kept putting off the inevitable.

Jed wouldn’t let it alone and sure enough he brought along his friend Marty when he came to pick me up. Martine wasn’t home at the time and when she did come through the door it wasn’t one of her better days.  She nodded to the three of us sitting there and waltzed passed and slammed the door to her bedroom.

“Is she coming back?” Jed asked.

“I doubt it.  I told you this wasn’t a good idea.”

“I’m going to try.”

“You go right ahead.”  He got up and walked to her bedroom door and knocked.  I heard him knock several  times and when he got no response, he called out to her.  Martine ignored that too.  He finally gave up and came back to join us in the living room. 

Jed apologized to his friend and suggested that perhaps another time.  Unbelievable to me, Marty said yes to his suggestion.  The three of us left and enjoyed a pleasant time.  Jed dropped me off after the date and I found Martine sitting in the living room waiting for me.  She was in a tirade about how this was her safe space and I allowed someone else to invade her privacy.

“I live her too, Martine.  No one invaded your privacy.”

“Oh, really,  I must have imagined Jed banging on my door and calling out to me.  The minute I walked in the door and saw that guy I knew what you had planned.  I don’t do blind dates or set ups as you well know. “

“I had nothing to do with it, I didn’t know Jed was bringing Marty by.  I’ve been discouraging him for weeks not to do it but you know men, they think they know best.”

“Well, they don’t.”  She clammed up after that and I eventually retired to my room.

When I saw Jed the next day we spoke about the fiasco of the night before.  He said he was sorry and he should have listened to me. 

“Yeah, please, let’s not try that again.  You don’t know Martine the way I do, and I don’t want to jeopardize our relationship.  So please, let’s just leave well enough alone.

Several weeks went by.  I came home from work one day to a strange car in the driveway.  To say I was shocked when I walked in and saw Jed’s friend Marty sitting there talking with Martine, was an understatement.  They seemed to be getting on very well and barely acknowledged my presence.  I gave them their privacy and immediately texted Jed.  Jed phoned me immediately.  He told me that Marty said he was going to try again.  “I tried discouraging him but…”

I heard the front door close and expected a knock on my door.  When it didn’t come, I walked out to an empty house.  Martine had left with Marty.  I fell asleep waiting for Martine to come home.  I wanted details, lots of details.  I woke up with a crick in my neck and all the lights off. I’d would have to wait til morning .

In the morning Martine was very close mouthed about Marty.  Jed had given Marty Martine’s number – hed’ called and set up a date.  When I asked Martine what it was that made her agree to go out with him, her response was that he called her on her ‘bullshit’. 

“What?”

He told me that my behavior the night he came over was rude and childish and I owed him and Jed an apology.  I chuckled because one thing Martine did not do was apologize.

“Well, I know you didn’t apologize, so what happened.”

“Actually, I did apologize and I’m glad I did.”

“What?”

“You could say he made a very convincing argument.”

“And what argument was that.”  Martine got all red-faced.  Finally, she blurted out that he told her if she didn’t apologize he was going to take her over his knee and spank her until she did.  He said she was being a brat and that’s what happened to brats. 

“and you just gave in an apologized.”

“No, I didn’t”

“Are you telling me that he spanked you and you let him.”  Martine said it wasn’t really a matter of letting him, that before she knew what was happening she was upended over his knee getting her bottom whacked.

She said that was all there was to it.  She finally gave in and apologized and he told her that she could expect to be chastised whenever she crossed the line.  I was dumbfounded but never more so than when she told me she actually looked forward to crossing that line again.

See you later for more Aimless Ramblings.

Moving On

February 5th  already.  I was never fond of the month of February when I was younger.  Now that time speeds on by so darn fast I wouldn't mind if it lingered a little longer - at least now that I don't have to put up with winter, and there is Valentine's Day right in the middle, so it's doable.

Was the Super Bowl super for you?  Our team didn't make it this year, not even close, so I really had no interest and neither did Ray.  NE and Bill Bellichek are not his favorites (sorry Katie), mine either for that matter so we didn't even watch.  It was a productive day though.  We went to brunch with friends and I managed to talk Ray into going shopping.  He needs new shoes and it's the one thing I won't buy for him, he's too hard to fit.  He lucked out and found a couple of pair at Skechers. After making a few more stops we came home and watched movies the rest of the night.

Here is the continuation and the END of the story I've posted the last couple of weeks.  I'm moving on for the moment. 

The next morning I sat with my cup of coffee on my still sore backside and thought about Rhonda.

Could we become friends? After all, we shared a bond most women would not understand, at least not the women of today.    Most of my old friends from here had moved on and the only women I knew were the wives of my husband’s colleagues.  Hardly, the people I wanted to include in my life.  They were nice enough on the surface,  but I wouldn’t feel comfortable sharing any secrets with them. 

I contemplated this thought as I squirmed around in my chair trying to get comfortable.

“What’s wrong this morning, honey?  You’re squirming around like a worm on the end of my fishing line? “ He had the nerve to ask me that with a smile on his face.  I really wanted to wipe that smile away but with Lindsey sitting there at the table with us, I just sent him a glare that immediately removed his smirk.

“I was thinking of inviting Rhonda and her husband over to dinner.  I think we may have a lot in common.”

“You have to be kidding, didn’t you hear anything I said last night?”

“I heard plenty, thank you very much.  Lindsey, sweetie, isn’t it time you started getting ready for school.”  I saw the look on Rod’s face, he had forgotten all about Lindsey sitting there. When Lindsey left the room I told Rod that I thought that Rhonda and I shared a bond.

“You do what you want but no more parties.  I don’t know why we have to have dinner with them.”

I called Rhonda later that morning and invited her to lunch sometime that week.  My thinking was we could start off just the two of us and then include the husbands at a later time. I knew Rod would be more comfortable with that.  To my surprise, she turned down my invitation.  I was hurt and she must have heard it in my voice so she explained.

“I’d love to take a raincheck on your invite.  You know how I talked about my husband’s old-fashioned ideas, well as part of my punishment for not letting you in on what you might encounter at our party, I’m grounded for the remainder of the week.  I feel so embarrassed saying that but you already know about the rest.”

“Yes, sadly I do.  My husband made sure that I wouldn’t accept any more invitation to parties where we could not take our daughter.  I’m still sore this morning after the belting I received.

“You too, huh. 

“Well, since you’re grounded, how about I bring lunch to you and we can sit and commiserate together.”

“ I would like that.  Can you make it about one, I have some other chores to do first?”

Just like the line in the movie Casablanca, that was the start of a beautiful friendship. Eventually, I did invite Rhonda and her husband to dinner.  As much as Rod hated to admit he might have been wrong about them, he found himself becoming friends with Jeff.  Rod even accepted that Jeff continued to imbibe his marijuana but never in our house and never around Lindsey.

It wasn’t until about a year later that Jeff decided Rod was going to partake of some of the joys of weed. By this time, dinner at each other’s house was a normal thing.  We’d have cocktails, dinner, play some card or board game, get in the hot tub more times than not and then home.  This particular night, Jeff clued me in on what was about to occur.  We were invited to their house for dinner and spaghetti was on the menu.  

We had wine before and with dinner and shortly after dinner Rod began feeling the effects of the ‘oregano’ in the sauce.  He commented that he was feeling the effects of the wine and backed off drinking but became more and more ‘loose’ and we were enjoying his ‘inebriation’ when he announced he couldn’t believe how hungry he was after such a filling dinner.  We thought we would all die laughing. Not all, Rod couldn’t understand what was so funny.  Rhonda served dessert and I laughed as I saw Jeff scarf down three brownies – this from the man that never liked dessert.  He definitely had the munchies.

By the time we hit the hot tub that night we were all enjoying the effects of friendship, laughter and marijuana.  Rod was the first in and soon off came his trunks as he threw them onto the decking.  To say I was surprised was an understatement – here was my husband skinny dipping, so to speak, in our neighbor’s hot tub.  Jeff, not wanting him to be alone, joined in.  It wasn’t a big deal for Jeff, he’d done it many times before as had Rhonda and me, although never with Jeff around.   Sometime during our time in the spa, the effects of the marijuana began to wear off and Rod realized he was sitting there nude.  He jumped up which immediately set off a round of laughter from us as we saw the light bulb come on.

That’s when he realized what had happened and that I was in on the joke.  He pointed his finger at me.  Jeff interceded and said it was all his idea and he wanted Rod to see there was really not much difference between alcohol and marijuana.  Well, except maybe for the munchies and that you were relaxed a lot sooner and had none of the after effects.  Rod took it all in and sat there as Jeff and Rhonda climbed out.  When I started to climb out, he pulled me back.

“You are not getting out of this hot tub nude.”

“Well, Rod, I can’t stay here all night.”

“I’ll get out and get you a towel.”  I laughed at him which probably wasn’t the smartest thing I could do, but it was so silly.

“Honey, too late, Jeff and Rhonda have already seen me nude.  You know what, they don’t care, why do you?"

“No one besides me sees my wife nude.”

“Honey, that ship has sailed.  Rhonda and I sit here nude almost all the time during the day.”

“You mean to tell me you sit out here, sans clothes, so anyone can see you.”

“Yup, that’s what I’m saying.”

“That does it, when I get you home you’re going to have such a red ass that you won’t want anyone seeing you nude.  There might even be some black and blue marks.”

I laughed – again probably not the smartest thing I’ve done.

True to his words, Rod climbed out and found a towel and shielded me from any prying eyes as I climbed out of the hot tub.  We got into our clothes and walked into the house.  Rhonda and Jeff were sitting there in their bathrobes. I was surprised that Jeff was as nonchalant as he was as he shook Jeff’s hand and gave Rhonda a kiss on her cheek.

“Thanks for a fun evening and the lesson.  I might have to rethink a few things but right now we’ve got to get home so I can impress upon my wife it’s not good to have fun at my expense.”

I rubbed my bottom.   Rhonda giggled and I told her that she owed me one.

Sure enough, it was a few days before I wandered into the hot tub nude.  My bottom was painted with enough color to be a painter’s palette and sitting, well that’s another story.

See you later for more Aimless Ramblings.